


Habitual Parker

by Maxie_A



Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: (They're not the same thing.), Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Gen, I'll probably add more tags in the future, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-21 15:25:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7393003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxie_A/pseuds/Maxie_A
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peter Parker, struggling with many inner demons, finds himself making a Youtube channel in order to satisfy his friends, and ends up becoming much too popular much too quickly. He also begins to see things that he wish he saw before, both in himself and the people around him.</p><p> </p><p>Alternatively: Harry convinces a struggling friend to set up a Youtube channel, and ends up entirely surprised to find his friend's face plastered onto his Tumblr dash.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve been dealing with depression, anxiety, stress, and in general pretty bad experiences, and recently I began daydreaming of Peter talking to a camera about his own depression, his own life, and how things truly effect him. I also apparently have a lot of time on my hands between the times I actually have internet access. (Which is literally none. This is a rare instance.)

   Peter knew he was a creature of habit. He set a routine for everything he did, and made damn sure the routine would work for him. He made certain he could work it around Spider-man as well, and he's rather proud of himself for that. Of course, in the process, he pushed his friends and even his Aunt May away from himself. The distance between him and a social life is jarring, but he's never liked being touched, and the amount of anxiety that coursed through him whenever he tried to speak with someone would sometimes be too much to handle. He constantly fretted about what he should or shouldn't say, and if what he said previously could be taken in offence in any way. Sometimes he worries that he may have accidentally said something in the wrong tone, and that it would be taken differently because of that. (Because god knows, it's happened many times before.) He likes to tell himself that it's a good thing he's distancing himself. That he's less stressed, and that maybe a little break from a social life will do him good.

  
   He knows, logically, that it's a complete lie. He is a creature of habit, and his biggest habit is his guilt complex. The idea that he's pushed people away terrifies him, and he hopes to god that he hasn't hurt anyone's feelings too badly. The guilt tends to eat him alive, and the pain simply builds as time goes by. His depression, ironically enough, helps by supplying him the idea that his friends probably don't care that much anyways. But his anxiety quickly counters, saying that they'll probably still be angry that someone pushed them away at all, regardless if it were Peter or not.

  
   He sometimes entertains the idea of telling his friends about his feelings, about how sorry he is, but anxiety tells him it would just anger them, so he keeps his mouth shut. 

  
   Peter was a creature of habit. When anxiety ate at him, his fingers would find the hem of his shirt, and twist and pull and wrinkle, and sometimes, when his Aunt May has to slap his hands away because they're at a formal gathering, he locks his hands together behind his back and pulls at each finger, creating faint popping noises that thankfully no one notices is his joints, cracking in each part of his finger.

  
   When depression ate at him, it was another matter. During those times, he would become either uncharacteristically quiet, or uncharacteristically loud. When he's in a large crowd, it's usually quiet, and he sneaks to a corner so he could bite his lip hard and look down at the points of his shoes, sometimes shifting to step on a foot, as if the painful pressure will keep him grounded to reality. When he's in a small group, he usually opts to become loud, smiley, and incredibly giggly. He cracks horrible puns and jokes, makes wild hand movements, and focuses on making sure his façade goes unnoticed by the people around them. 

  
   He's so sure they've noticed. They make looks at him, occasionally, as if his face were the pages of a particularly confusing, but deep, book. Harry was the first to notice, he thinks. In actuality, Harry has probably always known about Peter's feelings, ever since they've met. But it's like he's picked up on the distancing, noticing that Peter's mind has continuously gotten worse and worse over time, becoming a prison more than a sanctuary. Harry texts him frequently, and it's reassuring. Peter gets too frightened to actually start conversations, thinking he might be a bother or be texting at an inappropriate time. And Harry understands that. Harry also understands that he needs to make plans to hang out ahead of time, rather than on the spot, and Peter is even more grateful for that. There's a reason they became friends so quickly and easily.

  
   Aunt May was the second person to know, he thinks. While he didn't try too hard to put up a front when he first met Harry, he was always trying to smile his brightest around Aunt May and Uncle Ben after the incident with his parents. They thought that little Peter didn't understand the true depth of the situation at the time, but he did. He just wanted to be that little spark of happiness for them. He knew a crying child would just depress them further. 

  
   Aunt May noticed, after Uncle Ben's death, that this was Peter's way of coping. That simply smiling and telling her that everything would be okay, and doing his best to try and help out around the house, and making little jokes and laughing a little too loudly sometimes, was how he reacted to things like this. Things that were too depressing, things that broke him inside, in more ways than one. And she noticed that his behaviour never truly went away. She began giving him the same look whenever he came home, intensified whenever he arrived with a visible bruise. She doesn't ask if he's out doing things he'll regret anymore. 

  
   He thinks the supers might have picked up on his behaviour as well. Or, some of them, at least. Johnny Storm has made a point in trying to befriend Spider-man, who is seen by the public as either a confident, intelligent, and charming hero, or a confident, clever, deceiving menace. Peter, unexpectedly, at some point, decided to let Johnny try to strike a conversation with him after a particularly long, tiring fight, feeling too proud of himself to remember who he actually is behind the mask.

  
   "Hey, Spidey! Dude, this was awesome! Hey, so, I've been trying to get in contact with you, but there isn't exactly a 'Mr. Spider-man' in the phone book, you know? So, like, do you have an email or anything? You're pretty cool, and funny as heck, so I was wondering if maybe we could hang out sometime?"

  
   His confidence flew out the window, however, when he realised he had to open his mouth and respond. His entire posture changed, making him look exactly like he usually does as Peter, and his shoulders tensed up. He ducked his head down and brought his hands together once more, pulling on his fingers.

  
   There's a long pause, and Johnny's smile drooped just a bit, his eyebrows scrunching up in confusion. Peter has to force his answer out in a painfully levelled voice.

  
   "I'm... I'm not sure that's a great idea. I'm not exactly normal."

  
   "Well, you wear bright red and blue spandex, make jokes even when your life is in danger, and swing about the city on thin little threads that you shoot out of your wrist. I think I sort of got that before I asked to be buds."

  
   "Not what I meant. I'm not who you think I'm like, Torch. It's best if you... don't put yourself into a position where you have to deal with me. I'm not that great to be around."

  
   Since then, Johnny hasn't exactly been subtle in his glances, nor has the rest of the Fantastic Four, who apparently all heard the conversation the two teenagers had that day. The same look, all the time. It makes him feel nauseous, that even as Spider-man he can't escape from his self-destructive tendencies.

   Sometimes, he just wants an outlet. Something to pour his words into. Something no one would ever find. Someplace where his face held no true meaning. That seems like too much of a fantasy, of course. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is going to focus on Harry and his involvement. (Although, it still mostly focuses on Peter, even from Harry's POV.)
> 
> This is not going to be a first person story.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Help I'm using my phone, this is torture

    Peter is a creature of habit, if anything else. He sets routines, and doesn't like surprises or on-the-spot planning. When he became Spider-man, however, it became incredibly difficult for him to set up planned hangouts, because he would always get into some trouble before finally making it to the meeting place, battered and bruised. Anxiety constantly eats at him when Harry, or Aunt May, or _anyone_ looks him up and down, taking in his thoroughly beaten look. Even when they don't bring it up, he knows, logically, that they're still thinking about it, silently wondering what he did. Harry, at this point, believes he's been purposely picking fights so that he'd get hurt. Harry knows more about Peter than Peter knows about himself, and what Peter doesn't know is that he tends to subconsciously do things to hurt himself without actually bringing a sharp object into the picture. He's snarked back at Flash multiple times and didn't even react to the bully's actions, as if he had fully expected, maybe even hoped, for the violence to come raining down on him. He's also neglected to eat at lunch sometimes after tests, or when a teacher yells at him. Harry's also noticed that sometimes, Peter doesn't even look to see if there are any cars driving down the street. He simply walks by, like he's hoping to get run over. And a lot of the time, he sees Peter purposely trying to get rid of any possibility of a future relationship, be it platonic or romantic. 

  
    Harry knows Peter is a creature of habit. He knows that the moment Peter sees someone is not only trying to strike up a conversation with him, but seeking a possible future friendship or romance, his anxiety and depression kick in worse than ever. He sees the little twitch at the corner of the brunette's lips, sees how his fingers are subconsciously attracted to the hem of his shirt, where he pulls, twists, and wrinkles. Sees how his voice suddenly sounds even wobblier than before, and his eyes are slightly wider than they would normally be. And he knows, this is where Peter begins shutting down. It all happens in a perfect routine, step by step, as he slowly shuts the very idea of future social interactions with the person into a vault. It works, every time, and Harry has to hold his voice back from mentioning the bad habit, because he's seen both Peter's anxiety and panic attacks before, and he knows how jarring it is for him. He also knows that Peter feels embarrassed every time he has one, and Harry wants to tell him he shouldn't be. He really shouldn't be, but Harry is Peter's best friend, and he knows Peter will simply think he's just being what any friend would be. He won't take it to heart.

  
    Aunt May doesn't notice all the time. It's because the most she's seen from a teenager is Peter, and she's come to assume that it's just what most teenagers are like nowadays. She does, however, question the bruises, and she does notice that Peter's defence mechanism is to pretend as if everything is alright, and to smile, and joke, and do anything he possibly can to help around the house. To be loud, giggly, and in general seem much too happy. And she does notice that this was the exact behaviour Peter had when he first began living with her and Uncle Ben. And she begins to realise that Peter's always been like this. Sometimes, she forgets, like when she and Peter are watching overly dramatic soap operas or listening to old show tunes, or when she gives him a lesson on how to knit and sew. (Knitting, specifically, becomes another habit of Peter’s very quickly. He begins making beanies for his friends, and a lovely red scarf for his aunt. No one teases him about it, because his work is actually sort of remarkable. Some people around the school even asked if they could buy one of his special "Parker hats.") 

  
    She always remembers when she sees the bruises, though, and she doesn't know what to think.

  
    Some people around the school have even begun to make rumours, since people are beginning to notice that none of the particularly bad injuries he has came from Flash. Harry tries his best to make sure Peter doesn't hear them, and that he doesn't see the people around him make glances and start whispering to one another. Peter notices, of course, and Harry knows because he can see the signs of anxiety and depression rising all over again. 

  
    He tries talking with Peter about it, trying to find a solution, because Peter can't go to a psychiatrist. Hell, Harry's too scared to even mention one, because again, panic and anxiety attacks aren't pretty, and he would never want to give his friend one simply because he was too careless in his wording. But Peter says he doesn't want to talk about it. That he doesn't like the idea of Harry knowing the full extent of what he's going though. That he wants Harry to simply focus on school, and hobbies, and things that make him happy. Harry takes that as Peter not wanting anyone who knows him to worry about him.

  
    One day, he confronts Peter after P.E., which thankfully for him is the last period, because Peter likes to wait until almost everyone isn't in the changing rooms before he goes back in and changes himself. 

  
    He finds him in the empty, dry shower, sitting on the wooden bench placed in there, stuffing his P.E., shirt into his backpack. Peter looks up as he's unfolding his sweater, jumping at the sight of his friend's unexpected appearance.

  
    "Sorry."

  
    "It's, um... Fine. It's fine."

  
    Harry nods and sits on the bench on the other side of the shower room, crossing his legs and stuffing his hands into his pockets.

  
    "Pete, I've been wanting to talk to you about... stuff. Nothing bad, or anything," he quickly reassures, because he can see how Peter's shoulders tensed ever so slightly. "I just noticed that you aren't feeling too great. I mean, more so than usual. And I know you don't want to tell me what's been going on, and I definitely know you don't want to see a shrink. I don't want you to, either. I know it'll give you another attack, and I don't want that for you."

  
    Harry pauses, looking for any physical signs of anxiety from his best friend, who's been eerily still. Peter seems to notice his lack of movement, and slowly nods, pulling the sweater over his head and shimmying his arms into the tight sleeves. Peter has been wearing the same clothes for years, and he's obviously outgrown them. Thankfully, most of his shirts are pretty long, so no one seems to notice. Jeans, however, are a different story, and Pete's been rolling up the cuffs to make them look like shorts for the past few years, now. Harry thinks he'll need to buy him new sweaters and pants on his birthday. And Christmas. And possibly any excuse of a holiday he can get.

  
    "So, what if you could talk to people, but not actually have to face anyone?"

  
    "If I were to make a Facebook or Twitter, everyone in school would find it and read everything, Harry."

  
    "Not Facebook, you dork," Harry snorts, shaking his head. "And not Twitter, either. I know you hate social media. I was thinking maybe something most people won't find. Like maybe Youtube."

  
    "Youtube?"

  
    "Yeah. You can talk and talk and talk about whatever you want, make up some lousy name so that no one will ever find it, because, c'mon, do you realise just how many videos are being made a day? It'll be near impossible for anyone to dig up your channel from the pile of cat videos and epic fails. And you don't even need to give me the name you choose. I won't try searching you up or anything, not like I'd be able to find it even if I tried, so you don't need to worry about your friends or family finding anything personal about you without you taking your time to actually tell them. You can go at your own pace, practice what you want to say. And maybe some random strangers will ask you a few questions, but you can't see their face, and you get to choose whether or not you answer their questions, so it's entirely in your control."

  
    Peter seems to perk up when he hears the last part, and Harry grins, because that's important. Peter knowing he's in complete control over what he talks about, who he answers to, without the consequences of anyone personally confronting him... It'll be good for him, he can tell. It's how he's wired. Peter functions differently than most people, and Harry's glad that he can understand that. Because he sees how people reacts to Peter's odd tendencies, his changes in personality, his painfully obvious obsessions, and how terrifying he is when he's determined to get something done. They think he's not totally right in the head, and they don't treat him like an actual person, sometimes. Peter needs someone who gets him. Harry would complain that there should be more people who gets him, really, but hey, that's a process. They'll get there, eventually.

  
    "Youtube's sort of a dying site, now, anyways. No one actually goes to the website unless they're looking for music videos or following really popular channels. You don't find many people searching up random things on it anymore. That's more for Tumblr, now. Which I know you won't get. I'll make sure you won't get a Tumblr, because although there's a lot of nice people on there, you'll find a lot of people there who will attack you for the stupidest things, and I don't want you to deal with that kind of stress. On Youtube, you can choose whether or not you want people to comment on your videos, so you're safer there."

  
    Peter slowly nods again, and Harry's confident that he's actually getting through to him, this time.

  
    "Anyways, will you think about this one? I really think it'll help you build confidence in yourself and figure out the best way for you to talk to someone. Look, I even got you a cool video camera."

  
    Harry shrugs his backpack off his shoulders and digs into it, pulling out a black, zipped up pouch, containing a shiny new camera.

  
    "Harry, I can't take—"

  
    "It's a gift," he quickly says, interrupting the other. "You really do seem like you've been feeling a lot more down than usual, and I know you really like photography. I thought that maybe you could start taking videos, too. Might give you a bonus from Jameson, so it can be posted on the Daily Bugle website. It could help relieve some of the stress you and your Aunt May have been building for a while. I know you don't like taking money, so I decided I'd at least help out in some way, you know?"

  
    Peter's stares at him with wide eyes for a moment, and a smile slowly forms. He lets out a sigh, getting up and walking over to take the camera.

  
    "Thanks Harry. You really put thought into it, and... Thank you. Really."

  
    "Hey, we're friends. You were there for me at my worst, even when you had so much of your own stuff to worry about. I want to be there when you're feeling down, too."

  
    Peter nods, and his smile widens just a bit, and Harry thinks that maybe things are going to get better.

 

* * *

  
    A couple of weeks later, Peter doesn't say anything about whether or not he made a channel. But Harry knows that he's using the camera beautifully, because there's perfectly edited videos on the Daily Bugle website that is definitely Peter's work. The battle between Rhino and Spider-man was a huge hit on the web, since the camera moved perfectly with the battle, while still remaining at the same vantage point. Impossible to do with human hands, but knowing Peter's geeky side, he probably made some modifications so that the camera would move on its own, even zoom in at perfectly timed moments. He must have strung it up with a super computer or something, so that it would predict the movements in the battle. 

  
    Harry's watching the same video again on Tumblr, this time, because it really is entrancing work, and it still comes around to his dash rather frequently, along with a few other Spidey videos. Harry decides to see if his dash has anything new, and he refreshes the page. He quickly scrolls past another Spidey vid that pops up at the top of his dash, the one where he handles a hostage situation pretty damn well, and Harry's breath catches in his throat. He nearly chokes on absolutely nothing, because to his surprise, while it is another video made by Peter, it's not a video about Spider-man. Peter's face stares right into the camera, and he's sitting on the wooden chair incorrectly, resting his chin on his arms, which are propped up on top of the backrest. The amount of notes are horrifying, and although none of the comments made seem to be negative, he knows that Peter is probably having a mental breakdown over the amount of attention this video has gotten.

  
    If he knows about it.

  
    Peter doesn't have a Tumblr. Nor any real social media. He doesn't really hang out on the internet much unless it has something to do with searching for a place to eat, or researching for class or something. It's entirely possible that Peter doesn't even know the amount of attention that he's getting. Hell, Harry doubts that Peter even checks to see how many views his videos get after he posts them. 

  
    But Harry knows, truthfully, that Peter would have gotten some sort of notification by now. He clicks on the Youtube link to the video, and he's suddenly overwhelmed by the amount of views it actually has. Peter's channel is called "Habitual Parker," and yeah, he really should have expected that. He clicks on it, and he sees the amount of videos Peter made, and the amount of subscribers he has, and sees that his videos are perfectly categorised in different playlists, because Peter's like that. It's an endearing quality, really. 

  
    He clicks on all of the videos, muting his laptop so he doesn't have to listen to anything Peter doesn't want him to hear, and he finds that only one video out of all of them actually has the comment section open. He half-expects jerks criticising Peter for his weirdness, but is pleasantly surprised to find just how overwhelmingly good-natured the comments are, especially for a site like Youtube. They ask him science questions, say that they like his jokes and sarcasm, some people actually try flirting, which is a little amusing, Harry has to admit. Some people are talking about anxiety, depression, and other mental disorders that Harry doesn't really know about, but decides he'll look up later, because if it has anything to do with Peter, he has to know.

  
    The more he reads the comments, the more he realises just what Peter's videos are about. And the more he realises why people are so attracted to the things that Peter has to say. A lot of people who spend more time on the internet than anything are usually there because they're looking for an escape, of some kind, since so many of them deal with similar problems. Anxiety and depression is something people can relate to, and Peter can be pretty damn great with words when he's not feeling any pressure, Harry knows that much. Peter's making descriptions of what these problems are, and what they feel like, and how it effects a person. How extreme they can actually get, and how it can completely destroy a person. 

  
    Some of the science things in the comments suggest that Peter actually talks about the science behind these problems. Typical.

  
    He stops scrolling through the comments and leans back in his chair, stretching his legs and bringing his hands up to rub his palms against his eyelids. This is very likely a disaster, but at the same time, Harry's not so sure. The amount of support Peter is getting from the people following along with his videos is unexpected, and Peter doesn't like surprises. He's not that great at dealing with something he was planning on never happening, and it can either give him an anxiety attack or make him dissociate so hard he's barely even considered conscious. 

  
    Harry looks at the clock. Two minutes until 8:00. Peter doesn't like being called before 8:00 or after 9:00, which is a fairly recent development, but Harry just rolled with it. 

  
    He decides to scroll through the comments some more until the two minutes are up, and the moment the clock strikes 8, he picks up his phone and quickly dials Peter's number. It rings for a while, and Harry almost believes Peter won't answer, but it does at the last second, the brunette sounding out of breath, voice almost raspy.

  
    "Hello?"

  
    "Hey, Pete, are you okay? Do you need me to come over, I can—"

  
    "No! No, I'm good, I'm fine! So, what's up?"

  
    Harry suddenly realises that Peter doesn't actually know about the video, and he wonders just when exactly his video got popular to begin with. The last video Peter posted was yesterday, so he must have seen the amount of recognition he was getting then. Of course, there's the possibility that Peter's video was an overnight hit, which would really freak him out. Really, really freak him out.

  
    "Well, I just wanted to talk to you, I guess? You sure you're okay? You sound like you've been running a marathon. While drinking hot sauce."

  
    "Oh, um, well, it's excitement, I guess. I just got another video for the Bugle. Spider-man just dealt with this guy, Otto Octavius."

  
    "Oh yeah, you've talked about him before. He's a scientist, right?"

  
    "Well, er, sort of? He's recently been in a lab accident and has been in the hospital for a while. You know, I told you, I have no idea why I'm repeating it—"

  
    "It's fine, dude."

  
    Peter takes a deep breath, then lets it out. He clears his throat, and when he talks, his voice is a lot more smooth. 

  
    "Right. Okay, so anyways, remember when I told you those metal arms sort of got fused to his body? Well, they aren't broken. The thing that is broken, however, is apparently the scientist's brain. He apparently broke out of the hospital and nearly killed a bunch of people, but they were in a hospital, so, like, they got immediate attention, don't worry. Anyways he broke out, and then he decided to try and rob a bank. With, you know, strong as hell, giant metal octopus arms that he can control at will? Freaky stuff, man!"

  
    "Peter, please tell me you didn't get too close to the fight."

  
    "Uh, well... I didn't try to, but the fight kind of got close to me. Trouble likes to come and find me for some reason. Parker luck, you know? The usual."

  
    Harry sighs.

  
    "Well, okay, then. If you didn't purposely try to jump into the crossfire for a video, then I guess it's alright. You did get a video, right?"

  
    "Yup! One of my best, if I do say so myself! Dude, you should see the tech on those metal arms! You'll see it on the Bugle soon, though. Well, not too soon. I'm sort of far from my house. I saw a guy with octopus arms run across the city, and it was Otto freaking Octavius, so I decided better follow this dude! And I ended up getting way off track, and—"

  
    Harry continues to listen to Peter ramble about the experience, getting up to grab a coat. Peter let slip which bank was robbed, and Harry decided that if Peter was pretty far from home, he should go pick him up.

  
    "Hey, Pete? I'm going to get a cab and help you get home, okay? Not before stopping at a market. From what you're telling me, you've forgotten to get the groceries again."

  
    There's a long pause on the other end of the phone, and Harry begins laughing.

  
    "Shut up!"

  
    "I'm sorry, but dude! How do you always forget the groceries? You basically work on autopilot when it comes to routines and stuff, you never need to be reminded. This Bugle job is really distracting you."

  
    "Hey!"

  
    "I'm not telling you to quit, man! I don't blame you, I'd drop everything I was doing to get a front row seat of some live action battles, too. Your videos really make me want to go out there and experience the moment for myself."

  
    There's a lot of grumbling on the other line that Harry can't quite understand, but as he enters the elevator, he can pick up the words 'stupid,' 'reckless,' and 'injured.'

  
    "Hey, are we talking about me, here, or you? How many bruises did you get this time, dork?"

  
    "...I don't know. I think my entire left face is numb right now, actually."

  
    "Ouch."

  
    Harry finally makes it to the lobby and walks to the front, holding a hand out to signal a cabby.

  
    "Dude, you need to be more careful. I'm tempted to force you to wear a bullet proof vest under your clothes, or something."

  
    "Spider-man usually stops bullets before they even make it out of the criminal's gun.”

  
    Harry snorts as a cab pulls up. Peter is ridiculous when it comes to Spider-man, honestly. He follows the guy every chance he can get, glorifies him, defends him… Harry knows about hero worship, but his friend’s crush is bordering on obsessive. He ends up having an argument about Spider-man with Peter the entire ride, up until he picks him up at the side of the road, where they start arguing about which market they should go to.

  
    “Harry, I always go to the organic market—“

  
    “For goodness’ sake, Peter, that’s on the opposite side of the city! What, do you have your hubby Spider-man swing you all the way there and back, just to keep up with a ridiculous routine you set up for yourself? It’s no wonder your aunt is always worried, you must be up past midnight just to get those groceries, do your homework, school, your part-time job… You’ve got a lot on your plate, man. Start taking it easy. There’s a nice little market right by your house, and yes, it’s organic.”

  
    Peter makes a face. The Indignant Face. Harry’s beginning to see that Peter’s been using that far more often than usual.

  
    "Alright, okay, I get it, but just this once, okay? You look like a rattled fruit, your skin is covered in blotches, and I don't want you getting into more trouble for tonight. Your aunt is probably worrying."

  
    Peter shifts in his seat, tucking his hands under his bum to keep himself from showing any outward nervousness. (Which proved rather fruitless, considering Harry knew him best, and of course Harry noticed how nervous Peter is.)

  
    "I, uh. Well. Um. She doesn't know I'm out? Because I kinda, sorta, snuck out the window?"

  
    Harry thinks he should be surprised. He really should be. But Peter's been breaking a lot of his routines recently, no matter how hard he's been trying to cling to them, so this sort of teenage rebellion behaviour doesn't shock him as much as it should. It would probably give his father a heart attack, though, he thinks idly with a mental smirk. 

  
    "I refuse to sneak back in with you."

  
    "Aw, c'mon Harry! I've been wanting to show you what I did with the camera, I've got a code saved on my laptop I think you might be interested in. You're literally the only person I have who's even remotely interested in all the computer tech I love."

  
    Harry remembers the video, and thinks, maybe Peter will need someone to help him. The probability of him having an anxiety attack, or worse, a panic attack, is very high. In fact, Harry's almost certain he's going to have a full blown panic attack. He's refrained from saying anything up until now, because again, he knows how embarrassed Peter gets when an attack passes. He'll just feel humiliated if he were to have one in public. And Harry's not going to freak him out and make him feel that way. He's a good friend for a reason, after all. 

  
    Still, he'll probably have to say something before Peter gets a surprise chucked at his face when he logs onto his email. It's better to be told by a friend, rather than a lifeless computer screen.  
 

    "Okay, fine. But I'm not sneaking in, I'm going to ring the front door bell like a respectable gentleman, unlike yourself, the ungrateful little brat who forgets groceries and then proceeds to sneak out of the house."

  
    "Good enough for me!" Peter says, grinning from ear to ear, and Harry feels a small seed of guilt sprout somewhere in his abdomen. 


End file.
